I have heard many stories.

Stories concluding happy endings and ultimate happiness.

The perfect dream

Where I will never have to face reality

A perfect getaway

But no.

Countless nightmares topple over one another.

The pain sears through my weak frail skin

The matters I have to worry about

The trivial things that come to my mind when I’m not around you.

It is ridiculous to get repeatedly hurt

It is absurd to realise the stressful situation you are trying to salvage

One little mistake leading to the next

It wears me down

Getting emotional about all this

Isn’t it a waste of my time?

If it is,

I would have quit a long time ago.

Then what am I holding onto now?

I cannot carry on any longer

But I do not want to lose this battle

I do not even know what to do

I am practically helpless and terrified of what is going to happen next

If I am causing you pain,

Why didn’t you let go when you had the chance?

Why didn’t you leave before matters get out of hand?

This is ridiculous. Why am I going crazy over this? How I want to cry. How I want to run back into the comfort of your arms. How I want your presence now. I want my tears to flow freely like they did once before. They never did.